[2manycars]

Hey y'all,

Jason here. Thanks for all the commentary — 'cept those of you who hate me. :P

First of all, my personal car collection really doesn't have a bearing on reviewing new cars. I see yours'es points, but I'm not paid to review cars whether I like them personally. For the record, I hate a lot of cars that I give screamingly positive reviews for — and vice-versa. The question I answer is "does this car does what it says it will do on the box?" not "does Jason like it?"

I live in the SF Bay Area, and specifically in an area where roads are absolutely tiny and parking spots are even smaller. My e-Golf is too big to fit in half the parking spots here, so tiny cars work.

On the FWD EV: remember that I test cars for a living, which means I typically have a test car all the time. I don't actually need a daily-driver, but I do like to have a dinghy: something small that I can park in the city, or drive places where I wouldn't want to be in somebody else's $200k attention-getting brand-new car.

I have 9 other cars that require oil changes and maintenance, so an EV was an obvious choice — especially with HOV-lane access. And there was no way I was going to buy a penalty-box like a Bolt or a Leaf or even an i3.

The e-Golf is a GTI without turbo lag. It generates 1.07 g of ass-out skidpad grip thanks to sticky PS4Ses and a big 034 Motorsport rear bar. It leaves a GTI for dead in traffic, and is even quicker over bumpy-as-hell 1st and 2nd-gear twisties. Plus, it seats 5 or hauls refrigerators in a small footprint. No-brainer once you understand that.

Anyway, onto the G87.

I don't hate it. Dynamically it's a step forward. I don't think it's faster than the F87, but it puts power down much better. Still does the rear-end wiggle that we first felt in the E90 335i and E82 135i, but it doesn't break loose.

The UX is a nightmare. Sure you can get used to it, just like you can get used to Tinnitus. Doesn't make it good.

I'm really glad the M2 exists, so there's that. If I bought one, I'd probably enjoy it. But I have to point out that the last car did the "M2 Thing" better. It was (IMO) way better to look at, and it was unquestionably more fun to drive on a daily basis.

Was it a riot? No.

But it was fizzy and alive in a way that most modern BMWs aren't. Great engine, good steering, the right(ish) size, etc. It was a solid "good" as a daily... but became an unmitigated riot when you drove it at the limit, especially on a trac. (Like the Harris video pointed out.)

I'm sure the G87 will be just as good — if not better — when you're hooning it sideways. I didn't. I just... drove it. Around town, on some back roads, to the office. And there, it just feels like a... car.

A car with sand in the dampers, with great seats (despite the stupid scrotum-rest), with a decent manual, okay steering, meh visibility, a back seat I can't sit upright in, and a bunch of digital displays designed by blind people with no fingers who've never driven a car. Lane-keep that yanks the wheel right the F out of your hand (I was told by a very angry BMW that it's possible to turn this off permanently using a Profile), auto-blip that you have to turn off every time (see previous parenthesis), an engine that sounds just okay inside the car (it's absent at low revs, then harsh at the top of the tach), and an overall isolated experience (I was always going 15 mph quicker than I thought.)

Is it bad? Of course not. But pound for pound, in normal use, I think the old M2 did a better job at providing a special experience.

And that's why I brought up the GR86/BRZ. I've seen the "they're nothing special" comments but I couldn't disagree more. Measured by the numbers, they're indeed nothing special. But as an experience, they're unmatched.

If BMW's engineers spent time with cars like those — or CTRs, or even Porsche 911s — maybe they'd stop slapping "Ultimate Driving Machine" taglines on massively overweight luxury cars. The company is just conflicted — it wants to be a luxury brand, but keeps promising us that the experience will be there. It's just... not.

And the last M2 was the last BMW that had a personality at real-world speeds. Sadly, it, too, has become and M4. Super capable — kudos on that engineering and all, but... can we just have a little fun please?