[Samurai of 2day]

Originally Posted by hubbahubba

In anything I do, I feel it is very important to get the ball rolling in a positive way. In any interaction, whether it be face to face, an email or even a text, I start the conversation with “good morning” or “good afternoon”. It seems to set the event at ease, and make the interaction more productive. For most of my adult life I have been in construction, and management for the bulk of that. Construction guys can be a bit… difficult. From 2006-2010 I built a community in a very upscale area in North San Diego County. I had the same painting supervisor the entire time. He was a gruff old fart, and every single time he came into my office he would be hollering about this and that. From the very start, I’d let him finish his rant, and then I’d say “Larry, good morning.” Very quickly it became comical, and even though he’d still come in like a whirlwind, he’d end his rant with “Jim, good morning”. We worked together very well for the duration of the project, and I believe it was because the tone of professionalism and partnership to accomplish the task at hand was set from that very first “good morning”. Samurai of 2day stay the course, keep up what you are doing. If somebody can’t look past a rough exterior to your good heart, it’s their problem not yours.

I'll be using this page from your book. We'll done and we'll said.

[RickFLM4]

Originally Posted by hubbahubba

We do tend to dig our own holes.

Not all of them. Sometimes you get dealt a bad hand. But by and large, we do dig most of our own holes.

[Samurai of 2day]

Originally Posted by Gemini562

Honestly, it feels like the bad economy is really taking a toll on how people treat each other, especially in the service industry. It's like everyone's on edge because jobs are hard to come by, or they're just burned out from the ones they do have. I've noticed that even when you try to be polite and respectful, the response can still be cold or even rude. It's frustrating, especially when you go out of your way to be decent. But when you think about it, a lot of people are dealing with their own struggles, whether it's stress from work, financial pressure, or just being mentally and emotionally drained. It's tough, but I guess it's a sign of the times we're living in.

I get what you're saying and agree that people may be dealing with a personal or internal issue that day, or during a moment in time while on the job. You are right that we all have these moments.
I also understand that it is possible to not display the frustration generated by those issues in a public place, let alone a professional setting. We've all had to put our best foot forward, even when our energy levels are low.
I'm of the mindset that while it's healthy to express yourself naturally, there's an appropriate time and place for that, and usually the workplace is not it.

[floridaorange]

Sure makes you appreciate cities and states where the ppl are more even-keeled, like minnesota, wisconsin and various midwest areas, indiana….tempted to move to one of those bastions of normality.

[Tyga11]

Originally Posted by floridaorange

Sure makes you appreciate cities and states where the ppl are more even-keeled, like minnesota, wisconsin and various midwest areas, indiana….tempted to move to one of those normal bastions of normality.

I was in Wisconsin a couple of weeks ago and the people there are really something else. Everyone is super friendly from the hotel staff to co workers who I have never met. Very inviting place. They even had a live concert out on the capital mall. Reminded me of the 90's tbh.

[DrVenture]

Originally Posted by floridaorange

Sure makes you appreciate cities and states where the ppl are more even-keeled, like minnesota, wisconsin and various midwest areas, indiana….tempted to move to one of those normal bastions of normality.

I just had a conversation with my son the other day, who lives in Tampa, and was raised in the Midwest. His boss asked him why "the team" is too nice and he replied, " I’m from the Midwest, I don’t know what everyone else’s excuse is."

I never expect courtesy, I extend it and am not offended if there is no reciprocation. To let another person impact my behavior (or attitude) would seem to be the tail wagging the dog.

[Kaizer84]

To the OP, I agree with you 100%. I’ve felt like this for some time now and it is truly disturbing and alarming.

Most of the “adults” of today weren’t raised properly. This younger generation is the group that were awarded participation trophies, feel they are entitled to the world, and most don’t think they should even have to work hard to attain success.

These are the ppl we are dealing with and the lack of accountability that is prevalent throughout our society lets them get away with being rude, not being courteous, terrible manners, no care about spelling and grammar whatsoever.

Everyone is a victim when it’s time for accountability. It’s absurd. We have been on a slippery slope downward for a while and I think it will continue.

Oh and social media and lack of real interaction with real people. Being able to be nasty, rude, and pretty much say whatever you want behind a keyboard has had a huge negative impact on their “people” skills. Garbage.

[Samurai of 2day]

Originally Posted by Kaizer84

To the OP, I agree with you 100%. I’ve felt like this for some time now and it is truly disturbing and alarming.

Most of the “adults” of today weren’t raised properly. This younger generation is the group that were awarded participation trophies, feel they are entitled to the world, and most don’t think they should even have to work hard to attain success.

These are the ppl we are dealing with and the lack of accountability that is prevalent throughout our society lets them get away with being rude, not being courteous, terrible manners, no care about spelling and grammar whatsoever.

Everyone is a victim when it’s time for accountability. It’s absurd. We have been on a slippery slope downward for a while and I think it will continue.

Oh and social media and lack of real interaction with real people. Being able to be nasty, rude, and pretty much say whatever you want behind a keyboard has had a huge negative impact on their “people” skills. Garbage.

I've observed this evolution of the "participation awarded" generation, as well. Performance sub par...? Institution lowers the standard to make them feel better and reward sub par Performance, effectively diminishing the need to put forth any real effort, or get offended if you hold them accountable for said sub par Performance or mistakes made.
Then since no lessons are learned from ignoring mistakes, no need to work towards personal improvement.

[Lady Jane]

The chasm created by the tear of our morality fabric since the '50s, makes the Grand Canyon look like a pothole. There used to be accepted social behavior barriers but now it's a free-for-all. And God forbid if you criticize deviant lifestyles because now, you will be the one labelled evil. "Nuff said.

[vreihen16]

Originally Posted by Lady Jane

The chasm created by the tear of our morality fabric since the '50s, makes the Grand Canyon look like a pothole.

Me thinks that LJ's account has been compromised!!!!!

[Lady Jane]

Originally Posted by vreihen16

Me thinks that LJ's account has been compromised!!!!!

I think you're right. It didn't take long.

[XutvJet]

Originally Posted by DrVenture

I just had a conversation with my son the other day, who lives in Tampa, and was raised in the Midwest. His boss asked him why "the team" is too nice and he replied, " I’m from the Midwest, I don’t know what everyone else’s excuse is."

I live in the Midwest and have traveled all over the country. People tend to be nicer in the Midwest. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we tend to have a lot more "space" and aren't living on top of each and packed in tightly. Humans aren't designed to be caged in tight quarters with one another. It leads to rudeness, aggression, etc. I visited NY and Chicago back in the 80s as a kid. People were just as rude as they are today. Nothing has changed.

[XutvJet]

Originally Posted by Kaizer84

To the OP, I agree with you 100%. I’ve felt like this for some time now and it is truly disturbing and alarming.

Most of the “adults” of today weren’t raised properly. This younger generation is the group that were awarded participation trophies, feel they are entitled to the world, and most don’t think they should even have to work hard to attain success.

These are the ppl we are dealing with and the lack of accountability that is prevalent throughout our society lets them get away with being rude, not being courteous, terrible manners, no care about spelling and grammar whatsoever.

Everyone is a victim when it’s time for accountability. It’s absurd. We have been on a slippery slope downward for a while and I think it will continue.

Oh and social media and lack of real interaction with real people. Being able to be nasty, rude, and pretty much say whatever you want behind a keyboard has had a huge negative impact on their “people” skills. Garbage.

As a 50 y/o I'm not alarmed at all. NOTHING HAS REALLY CHANGED. Every generation thinks it's better than the other and the younger generations out of touch, pampered, don't work hard, etc. Go watch any 80s movie and note how teenagers are depicted. Put a mobile device in their hand and update their clothes and hair, and you've basically got the same kid.

My kiddos (15 and 19) have played sports beginning at 5 and my daughter a very high level club volleyball player. Neither got "participation" trophies. I know that it occurs, but only for the super young. This is just one of many things I hear 50+ somethings bitch about when talking about "kids these days".

When it comes to work, I see nothing different. My 19y/o son worked grocery just like myself. The kids are all the same as I was working grocery back in the 1990s. Same for the professional environment. I manage people in their mid 20s to mid 30s. They all require a certain type of managing style based on their generation, but even more based on personality.

IMO, the most problematic generation as a whole are the Baby Boomers.

"Professionalism" comes with years of experience. You can't expect a 15-25 y/o to act overly professional. Courteous? Sure. Ain't no one a professional at anything but maybe sports when they're in their teens and 20s.

[dreamingat30fps]

Originally Posted by XutvJet

As a 50 y/o I'm not alarmed at all. NOTHING HAS REALLY CHANGED. Every generation thinks it's better than the other and the younger generations out of touch, pampered, don't work hard, etc.

But.... maybe they are all correct. Maybe every new generation is INDEED worse than the previous generation. Maybe Idiocracy was a documentary.

[vreihen16]

Originally Posted by dreamingat30fps

But.... maybe they are all correct. Maybe every new generation is INDEED worse than the previous generation. Maybe Idiocracy was a documentary.

...and a warning to humanity.....

[Kaizer84]

Originally Posted by XutvJet

As a 50 y/o I'm not alarmed at all. NOTHING HAS REALLY CHANGED. Every generation thinks it's better than the other and the younger generations out of touch, pampered, don't work hard, etc. Go watch any 80s movie and note how teenagers are depicted. Put a mobile device in their hand and update their clothes and hair, and you've basically got the same kid.

My kiddos (15 and 19) have played sports beginning at 5 and my daughter a very high level club volleyball player. Neither got "participation" trophies. I know that it occurs, but only for the super young. This is just one of many things I hear 50+ somethings bitch about when talking about "kids these days".

When it comes to work, I see nothing different. My 19y/o son worked grocery just like myself. The kids are all the same as I was working grocery back in the 1990s. Same for the professional environment. I manage people in their mid 20s to mid 30s. They all require a certain type of managing style based on their generation, but even more based on personality.

IMO, the most problematic generation as a whole are the Baby Boomers.

"Professionalism" comes with years of experience. You can't expect a 15-25 y/o to act overly professional. Courteous? Sure. Ain't no one a professional at anything but maybe sports when they're in their teens and 20s.

I hear what you’re saying but I respectfully disagree. I am not 50+ like yourself. I am 35 years old and I’ve been courteous and had good manners, values, and principles instilled in me from a young age. To echo what Lady Jane said, the morality and values are lacking in this country. We all know it whether we want to admit it or not.

In regards to “professionalism”, it develops from having basic decency as a person and cultivating that into learning social cues and how to conduct oneself in the work place and a professional environment. If you are a teen working your first job, you should have that basic foundation from home and go out and know how to be respectful of others, greet people accordingly and know how to not be flat out rude. It’s not acceptable and I don’t think excuses should be made.

By your 20’s I don’t think it is too high of an expectation for ppl to understand how to conduct themself in the workplace whether it’s at Target/Walmart or at the airport, to reference the places the OP mentioned.

Setting low expectations such as you mentioned when you said you can’t expect a 15-25 y/o to act overly professional is part of the issue I believe. Why must we set the bar so low for ourselves and our young people?

[floridaorange]

Originally Posted by Samurai of 2day

Now I already know I'm not going to be treated nicely off the rip because of my physical appearance, (which has always been offensive to people)

That’s an interesting statement - can you explain what you mean?

[Samurai of 2day]

Originally Posted by Kaizer84

I hear what you’re saying but I respectfully disagree. I am not 50+ like yourself. I am 35 years old and I’ve been courteous and had good manners, values, and principles instilled in me from a young age. To echo what Lady Jane said, the morality and values are lacking in this country. We all know it whether we want to admit it or not.

In regards to “professionalism”, it develops from having basic decency as a person and cultivating that into learning social cues and how to conduct oneself in the work place and a professional environment. If you are a teen working your first job, you should have that basic foundation from home and go out and know how to be respectful of others, greet people accordingly and know how to not be flat out rude. It’s not acceptable and I don’t think excuses should be made.

By your 20’s I don’t think it is too high of an expectation for ppl to understand how to conduct themself in the workplace whether it’s at Target/Walmart or at the airport, to reference the places the OP mentioned.

Setting low expectations such as you mentioned when you said you can’t expect a 15-25 y/o to act overly professional is part of the issue I believe. Why must we set the bar so low for ourselves and our young people?

I'm with you on this, and thank you for your "professionalism". I too am a few years under 50 and have been in my current profession for going on 25 years, now. While I can admit that my professionalism has increased through professional development, training and experience, I always approached the responsibility inherent in my positions over the past 2 and a half decades with a sense of humility, strength, purpose and pride, knowing those attributes are expected from those serving in the roles I filled over the years.
Now, I'm not expecting a 17 year old working in the fast food industry to approach their job the same way I approached my job as a rifleman when I was 19, but I can say even when I worked in supermarkets stocking boxes as a 14 year old, I still demonstrated basic human courtesy and respect to elders as a child just happy to know I'm getting paid, lol.

[Kaizer84]

Originally Posted by Samurai of 2day

I'm with you on this, and thank you for your "professionalism". I too am a few years under 50 and have been in my current profession for going on 25 years, now. While I can admit that my professionalism has increased through professional development, training and experience, I always approached the responsibility inherent in my positions over the past 2 and a half decades with a sense of humility, strength, purpose and pride, knowing those attributes are expected from those serving in the roles I filled over the years.
Now, I'm not expecting a 17 year old working in the fast food industry to approach their job the same way I approached my job as a rifleman when I was 19, but I can say even when I worked in supermarkets stocking boxes as a 14 year old, I still demonstrated basic human courtesy and respect to elders as a child just happy to know I'm getting paid, lol.

Same here. My early jobs while in college/ after college, I approached with a sense of purpose, pride, and respect for others as well as respect for myself because I was taught, your character and reputation is everything.

Years later and being in Law Enforcement for a while now that sentiment and way of carrying myself has helped me tremendously and I just thank my family for all of the lessons and the great examples they were while raising me and my younger brother.

Whether or not things are going your way or if people are disrespectful to you, you put your best foot forward and be the bigger person even if I was the junior in the situation.

I think people these days feel that it’s okay to conform to the lowered levels of conduct, respect, and overall quality of character so we end up where we are. And like I mentioned before, parents, families are not raising a lot of these children correctly but maybe it was passed down. But there has to be a line. And I think that’s what you were bringing up when you decided to start this thread. Just my two cents.

And lastly just to add, my early jobs in and out of college were service based customer facing “professional” jobs. Myself and many of my coworkers then were the consummate professionals, courteous, respectful, and efficient in our roles.

[Samurai of 2day]

Originally Posted by floridaorange

Now I already know I'm not going to be treated nicely off the rip because of my physical appearance, (which has always been offensive to people.


That’s an interesting statement - can you explain what you mean?

Thanks for the concern floridaorange . You're the second person to address this statement, so just want to clarify that I'm not in any dark or dangerous place or anything like that.
When I self analyze my perception of how my physical appearance is received by strangers, I can admit that it is based in residual issues caused by childhood bullying. No other way to put it.
We came to the US when I was 6, and I was constantly harrassed and physically attacked countless times up until my teenage years when i started returning punches, based on my accent and lighter skin complextion and hair texture... which didn't line up with the stereotypical appearance of what a Jamaican looks like.
Growing up in a densely populated urban environment in a predominantly black community didn't go well for me until I stopped accepting that treatment.
Fast forward to now, I'm much more confident in my right to exist, and have no issues defending myself in any manner deemed necessary to the circumstances, but it still happens.
Even as recent as last night, hanging out with some of my professional peers from accross the nation at a week long conference, a guy from Georgia response to my Jamaican nationality was "you're the most light skinned Jamaican I've ever seen" lol
Couple that with the fact that I'm not very popular with the ladies compared with the good looking guys in my circle, I get the impression my appearance doesn't inspire kindness, lol.

[tcphoto]

I think that social media has tainted people's perception of what is acceptable behavior, it has emboldened people to act disrespectful of others because there is no real ramifications for bad behavior. As a freelancer for thirty years, I approach every day like I need to make a good first impression and treat everyone like they're the one paying the invoice. You never know who will be promoted and will eventually be my "boss" for the day. On a personal level, I try to treat everyone like it's their worst day and act with empathy. It simply makes me feel like I'm a better person and I don't worry about what others think about me. As I recently heard actor Gary Oldman say, "don't worry about what others think about you, it's none of your business".

[rebekahb]

How can people be respectful when they don’t even respect themselves? Take a look at how a lot of people display themselves on social media these days. A good bit expose everything in one form or another.

In 2016, I went to Japan for the first time and that was the first time I was truly disappointed in how Americans handle respect. You don’t talk on your phone in the trains. People respect the rules. Here in America, who’s going to tell me I can’t talk on my phone. I mean look at the amount of people who walk around talking on speakerphone or play videos/games out loud. I remember being on the train to Osaka. A lady sits next to me with her young daughter on her lap. She asks me if it’s ok if her daughter has a snack because she didn’t want to disturb me. I was shocked. In a lot of areas in Japan trash cans aren’t prevalent (at least not like here). Very clean. People don’t throw stuff on the ground because a trash can isn’t near.

I think entitlement has really blown respect out the door.