How much to spend on a wedding ring? Update: divorced

ASBSECU E93 · 03-14-2016, 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

If the cost of the ring is a concern to her, take it as a warning. You may have bigger problems than a ring.

Sorry to rain on your parade.

And btw, the general diamond market is fraud. Read some history on it.
Cheers-mk

This....

Sorry for your loss OP

Delta0311 · 03-14-2016, 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Reborn_

I always thought the "3 months salary rule" was gross, not net. Which is absurd.

Is a bullshit ass rule developed by the diamond industry, to get dumbasses to waste their hard earned money on their worthless rocks.

McBride · 03-14-2016, 11:37 AM

Id never heard of the 3 month rule until now but she chose the ring she wanted and it was actually about 3 months.

You shouldn't be but If you interested in the investment side of it for future resale I would advise you to look at the cut and clarity of the diamond not the carat. As it happens my wife chose a ring that although expensive had a relatively small diamond. The type of diamond happened to be one of the best for clarity and cut, hence the price. When it's cleaned the depth and shine is amazing compared to other rings with larger stones.
I also had it valued 9 months after purchase for insurance purposes and its increased had increased in value by 20%. I was told it will continue to rise in value as well.

Andrew115 · 03-14-2016, 11:37 AM

This may be in order for you.

Pick out a ring and setting at your local store and get a stone here. I heard about this place on some talk show years ago. From what I can tell it seems like a quality product. Look at loose stones diamond hybrid very low cost.

http://www.miadonna.com

canukgtp · 03-14-2016, 11:44 AM

50k...wow...just wow...I spent 4k, and she loves the ring...as others have mentioned, if she is only focused on keeping up with rich friends you are going to regret it

C5driver · 03-14-2016, 11:47 AM

Don't make the mistake of giving an expensive engagement ring. She may do a 180 and you'll regret it.

1MOREMOD · 03-14-2016, 11:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by C5driver

Don't make the mistake of giving an expensive engagement ring. She may do a 180 and you'll regret it.

Take it back. Should be understood.

Verbiage · 03-14-2016, 11:54 AM

A wild C5driver appears.

Axius · 03-14-2016, 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD

Take it back. Should be understood.

Unless they go complete ghost. You can't ask a ghost for something back. Then what?

C5driver · 03-14-2016, 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD

Take it back. Should be understood.

2 words...restraining order.

atxgt3 · 03-14-2016, 11:57 AM

When I got married I had no money, so I proposed without a ring and my grandmother bought us some simple gold bands. I'm since divorced but to her credit my ex wife never, ever cared about money and never tried to scale up our lifestyle when I started making more.

My current girlfriend also doesn't care, if I buy a new toy (and I have a few) she's happy for me. She makes decent money, but although I make more than 20 times more than her she never tries to keep track and nor does she expect me to get her expensive presents or pay for anything for her. She never looks at what her girlfriends have, she just wants to work hard, be successful in her own right, and feel good about her own contributions to our relationship.

And THAT is why she's marriage material. Attitude is everything. Not just financially, but with everything. You want someone that is going to be a good partner and support you through everything, not someone that judges you by what you can do for them. You better believe if my girlfriend had started making demands about rings or expensive weddings or cars or gifts or anything else she would be gone in a heartbeat. There are a lot of reasons marriages can fail, but if you're going into a marriage with huge glaring red flags that you choose to overlook you have only yourself to blame when things get stressful and eventually fall apart.

jstnstr · 03-14-2016, 12:01 PM

To be fair she said she would be happy with something closer to $20k. I'm not saying that she's saying that's her bottom line won't accept anything less than that but that's her expectation.

Delta0311 · 03-14-2016, 12:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jstnstr

To be fair she said she would be happy with something closer to $20k. I'm not saying that she's saying that's her bottom line won't accept anything less than that but that's her expectation.

Does she live with you currently?

What does she do for a living?

atxgt3 · 03-14-2016, 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jstnstr

To be fair she said she would be happy with something closer to $20k. I'm not saying that she's saying that's her bottom line won't accept anything less than that but that's her expectation.

You're ignoring a bunch of red flags and making excuses.

Verbiage · 03-14-2016, 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Delta0311

What does she do for a living?

Obvious daddy's girl/princess.

Delta0311 · 03-14-2016, 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atxgt3

You're ignoring a bunch of red flags and making excuses.

That's like a woman saying. "to be fair, yeah he does beat me when he drinks but he buys me nice things".

Delta0311 · 03-14-2016, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Verbiage

Obvious daddy's girl/princess.

Oh a full time princess.

Verbiage · 03-14-2016, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jstnstr

To be fair she said she would be happy with something closer to $20k. I'm not saying that she's saying that's her bottom line won't accept anything less than that but that's her expectation.

Do you love her, OP? Because if you genuinely love her and can afford it/don't mind spending the money on it, perhaps it may work out for you. It doesn't seem like you're seeing the point everyone is making.

I have a feeling this is going to turn into another one of "those" threads.

MightyMouseTech · 03-14-2016, 12:07 PM

Give her a $500 ring. If she is happy with it, then she may be the one for you. If she says no because of the ring, then count your blessings and move on.

sirdaft1 · 03-14-2016, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jstnstr

To be fair she said she would be happy with something closer to $20k. I'm not saying that she's saying that's her bottom line won't accept anything less than that but that's her expectation.

Now you're just trolling...

Please tell me you're kidding.

jtodd_fl · 03-14-2016, 12:12 PM

My wife declined an engagement ring altogether. At the time, we were just getting by. Later in life, I offered to buy here a ring that would be reasonably expensive - had it picked out and everything. Let's just say it cost more than any car I have ever owned. She laughed at me and said it would be a huge waste of money. Get what works. I will agree with my doppelgänger on this one. If the price matters, run. It is a symbol. If money matters, that's symbolic for something alright.

David0ff · 03-14-2016, 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jstnstr

To be fair she said she would be happy with something closer to $20k. I'm not saying that she's saying that's her bottom line won't accept anything less than that but that's her expectation.

Sorry man.

On a very very very serious note.

Here is one questions that you should ask yourself,
Dont answer it here
If the answer takes time to come, or you are unsure
then you should walk away

Can you live without her?

If yes, then fuk it
If no then do whatever to make her happy

03-14-2016, 11:37 AM	#47
McBride First Lieutenant 132 Rep 364 Posts Drives: G31 M Sport + Join Date: Feb 2016 Location: Leeds, UK iTrader: (0)	Id never heard of the 3 month rule until now but she chose the ring she wanted and it was actually about 3 months. You shouldn't be but If you interested in the investment side of it for future resale I would advise you to look at the cut and clarity of the diamond not the carat. As it happens my wife chose a ring that although expensive had a relatively small diamond. The type of diamond happened to be one of the best for clarity and cut, hence the price. When it's cleaned the depth and shine is amazing compared to other rings with larger stones. I also had it valued 9 months after purchase for insurance purposes and its increased had increased in value by 20%. I was told it will continue to rise in value as well.
	Appreciate 0 Quote

03-14-2016, 11:37 AM	#48
Andrew115 Major 330 Rep 1,450 Posts Drives: Silver Bullet Join Date: May 2013 Location: Charlotte NC iTrader: (0)	This may be in order for you. Pick out a ring and setting at your local store and get a stone here. I heard about this place on some talk show years ago. From what I can tell it seems like a quality product. Look at loose stones diamond hybrid very low cost. http://www.miadonna.com
	Appreciate 0 Quote

03-14-2016, 11:44 AM	#49
canukgtp First Lieutenant 107 Rep 333 Posts Drives: 2018 M3 Join Date: Jun 2013 Location: New-Brunswick iTrader: (0)	50k...wow...just wow...I spent 4k, and she loves the ring...as others have mentioned, if she is only focused on keeping up with rich friends you are going to regret it __________________ 2018 F80 M3 6MT (current) 2014 F31 328i Touring (sold) 2008 E92 M3 6MT (sold) 2011 E90 335xi (lease up)
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03-14-2016, 11:47 AM	#50
C5driver Major 3492 Rep 1,125 Posts Drives: 55...just kidding. Join Date: Sep 2014 Location: 33.6167° N, 117.8975° W iTrader: (0)	Don't make the mistake of giving an expensive engagement ring. She may do a 180 and you'll regret it.
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03-14-2016, 11:54 AM	#52
Verbiage Dismembered Member 3631 Rep 9,213 Posts Drives: F80 ZCP 6MT, R55 Clubman S 6MT Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: DMV iTrader: (6)	A wild C5driver appears. __________________ My delivery experience and beach photoshoot here.
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03-14-2016, 11:57 AM	#55
atxgt3 First Lieutenant 156 Rep 346 Posts Drives: 11 E92, 17 X5M, 15 Huracan Join Date: Jul 2015 Location: TX iTrader: (1)	When I got married I had no money, so I proposed without a ring and my grandmother bought us some simple gold bands. I'm since divorced but to her credit my ex wife never, ever cared about money and never tried to scale up our lifestyle when I started making more. My current girlfriend also doesn't care, if I buy a new toy (and I have a few) she's happy for me. She makes decent money, but although I make more than 20 times more than her she never tries to keep track and nor does she expect me to get her expensive presents or pay for anything for her. She never looks at what her girlfriends have, she just wants to work hard, be successful in her own right, and feel good about her own contributions to our relationship. And THAT is why she's marriage material. Attitude is everything. Not just financially, but with everything. You want someone that is going to be a good partner and support you through everything, not someone that judges you by what you can do for them. You better believe if my girlfriend had started making demands about rings or expensive weddings or cars or gifts or anything else she would be gone in a heartbeat. There are a lot of reasons marriages can fail, but if you're going into a marriage with huge glaring red flags that you choose to overlook you have only yourself to blame when things get stressful and eventually fall apart.
	Appreciate 0 Quote

03-14-2016, 12:01 PM	#56
jstnstr Lieutenant Colonel 970 Rep 1,496 Posts Drives: G20 M340xi Join Date: Apr 2012 Location: SWFL iTrader: (2)	To be fair she said she would be happy with something closer to $20k. I'm not saying that she's saying that's her bottom line won't accept anything less than that but that's her expectation. __________________ \| M-Performance Exhaust \| JB4 Map 4 on E35 \| BMC Red Panel Filter \| \| Previous: 18 M3 ZCP \| 17 M3 6MT \| 15 M235i \|
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03-14-2016, 12:07 PM	#63
MightyMouseTech Major General 4346 Rep 6,196 Posts Drives: 13 135i 6MT LeMans Blue MSport Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: Ottawa, Canada iTrader: (0)	Give her a $500 ring. If she is happy with it, then she may be the one for you. If she says no because of the ring, then count your blessings and move on.
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03-14-2016, 12:12 PM	#65
jtodd_fl 2nd Asst to Dept Undersecretary 6709 Rep 1,298 Posts Drives: People crazy Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Florida iTrader: (0) Garage List 2015 F82 M4 [9.00] 2016 F87 M2 [0.00] 2011 E92 M3 [0.00]	My wife declined an engagement ring altogether. At the time, we were just getting by. Later in life, I offered to buy here a ring that would be reasonably expensive - had it picked out and everything. Let's just say it cost more than any car I have ever owned. She laughed at me and said it would be a huge waste of money. Get what works. I will agree with my doppelgänger on this one. If the price matters, run. It is a symbol. If money matters, that's symbolic for something alright. __________________ This space for rent.
	Appreciate 2 Quote