Eff School, This Is All You Need To Succeed!

Dmitriy@AUTOcouture · 01-15-2007, 07:51 PM

Lesson One
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him,
"Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"

The eagle answered: "Sure, why not."

So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and
rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on
the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson - To be sitting and doing nothing,
you must be sitting very, very hi gh up.

Lesson Two

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to
be able to get to the top of that tree", sighed the
turkey, "but I haven't got the energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?"
replied the bull.

"They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it
actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest
branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more
dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a
fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the
top of the tree.

He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of
the tree.

Management Lesson - Bull shit might get you to the
top, but it won't keep you there.

Lesson Three

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was
so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.
While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some
dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung,
he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing
him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon
began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird sing ing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow
dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Management Lesson -

(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

This ends your two minute management course.

teknochild · 01-15-2007, 07:54 PM

lol

BMW F22 · 01-15-2007, 07:58 PM

lol that was awesome

cm3rc · 01-15-2007, 07:58 PM

daheechang · 01-15-2007, 07:58 PM

i like the first lesson.nice

just4kickz · 01-15-2007, 07:58 PM

good stuff.

Ninjaneer · 01-15-2007, 08:02 PM

gonna send this to my friend who just started his MBA

Tony717 · 01-15-2007, 08:40 PM

lol

MonacoBimm · 01-15-2007, 08:42 PM

Thanks a lot man. I got to remind me this every day

SapphireBlackG01 · 01-15-2007, 08:51 PM

LOL. This was great.

txusa03 · 01-15-2007, 09:38 PM

01-15-2007, 07:51 PM	#1
Dmitriy@AUTOcouture Major 219 Rep 1,133 Posts Drives: carefully Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: NYC iTrader: (3)	Eff School, This Is All You Need To Succeed! Lesson One An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Management Lesson - To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very hi gh up. Lesson Two A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree", sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Management Lesson - Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there. Lesson Three A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird sing ing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Management Lesson - (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy. (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut! This ends your two minute management course.
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01-15-2007, 07:54 PM	#2
teknochild Your resident 4um troll 139 Rep 2,020 Posts Drives: 335 coupe Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: fl iTrader: (0)	lol __________________ RAWRrrrr
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01-15-2007, 07:58 PM	#3
BMW F22 Major General 3659 Rep 9,783 Posts Drives: ///M235i Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Bay Area iTrader: (8)	lol that was awesome
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01-15-2007, 07:58 PM	#4
cm3rc Colonel 85 Rep 2,221 Posts Drives: 2006 E90 Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Ferndale MI iTrader: (8) Garage List 06 325i [0.00]	__________________ www.socale90.com
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01-15-2007, 07:58 PM	#5
daheechang Colonel 129 Rep 2,424 Posts Drives: E30 m3 Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Shoreline iTrader: (14)	i like the first lesson.nice
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01-15-2007, 07:58 PM	#6
just4kickz boku no namae ha... 344 Rep 11,023 Posts Drives: 2006 BS 330i Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: S. Bay Area, CA + Newark, NJ + ChiCity + True Blue iTrader: (11) Garage List 2006 E90 330i [0.00]	good stuff. __________________ looking for a PreLCI Black Sapphire e90 front bumper without license plate holes "Akimbo shotguns. Broken wrists anyone? And don't give me that 'it's just a game' bull**. Where the are my akimbo interventions then?! One scope on each eye mother**er!!"
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01-15-2007, 08:02 PM	#7
Ninjaneer Shadow Warrior 151 Rep 2,095 Posts Drives: '07 335i Sedan Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Florida iTrader: (0)	gonna send this to my friend who just started his MBA __________________ 335i E90 / Arctic / Gray / Burl Walnut / Steptronic / ZPP / ZSP / Paddles / CA / Nav / PDC / OEM Spoiler Mods: PIAA Angel Eyes, Rear Fog Switch, Escort X50 Blue hardwire, 30% Charcoal Llumar Installing soon: Rear Power Outlets (Happy Robot mod!)
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01-15-2007, 08:40 PM	#8
Tony717 Lieutenant 39 Rep 462 Posts Drives: BMW 335d Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: FL iTrader: (1) Garage List 2006 330i [0.00]	lol __________________
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01-15-2007, 08:42 PM	#9
MonacoBimm Banned 45 Rep 1,859 Posts Drives: Sapp. Black 330i(2nd e90) Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Panama City, Panama iTrader: (1)	Thanks a lot man. I got to remind me this every day
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01-15-2007, 08:51 PM	#10
SapphireBlackG01 Captain 19 Rep 821 Posts Drives: ‘18 X3, Formerly ‘06 Z4 Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Here iTrader: (0)	LOL. This was great. __________________ Guy #1: "Hanz, I know zee window switches have always been next to zee shifter in zee 3er cars, but I think ve should move them to zee door!" Guy #2: "But zee doors are already designed and ve do not have time to re-design them!" Guy #1: "Just make it verk or you vill be verking over at VW!"
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01-15-2007, 09:38 PM	#11
txusa03 Major General 577 Rep 6,563 Posts Drives: TS330iPPSP6MT Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Planet Earth iTrader: (3)	__________________ under construction!
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